Man O’ War by Cory McCarthy

A Portuguese Man O’ War is not a jellyfish.

“Not only is it not a jellyfish, it’s not even an “it,” but a “they” … a colony of organisms working together,” (*Nationalgeographic.com). A mystifying being which often frightens the uneducated.

Mystifying and misunderstood like the antagonist in the YA novel Man O’ War by Cory McCarthy, Dutton Books, 2022. River McIntyre loves ocean creatures, loves being in the water, but doesn’t love who they are. As the story opens, they don’t understand themselves.

Young River struggles with who they are expected to be. McCarthy brings us along as they grow and emerge stronger and happier when they identify as their true self.

Categorized as an LGBTQ+ romance, this story offers more than most love stories. Sometimes, fiction can be both entertaining and educational. For me, this was an eye-opening emotional journey. LGBTQ+ relationships are considered non-traditional by many and that alone makes life difficult for those who identify with that community. Regardless of your opinion of real-life scenarios, reading this novel, you can’t ignore the painful struggle River endures and the love for themselves they finally accept. The emotions are fundamental and powerful.

McCarthy defines my generation as ‘dinosaurs’. It is as educational a story for us dinos as it is a compelling love story. This novel made me think. And, because it did, I recommended it to my book club. YA is not our traditional monthly read. However, we do love to engage in a good book discussion and this one generated not one but two.

At the meeting when I first announced the title and read a brief synopsis, every dinosaur in the room was open to sharing about a family member’s personal LGBTQ+ experience. The revelations focused mainly on how well it was accepted and how that acceptance or lack thereof affected the person’s life. It was a truly heartfelt conversation.

After reading Man O’ War, the discussion became somewhat more focused, even a little political, maybe even a little painful. Few people in the room knew a transgender youth personally. While most thought the story was well written, all found it emotionally difficult. Some felt it went too far in giving young people permission to permanently change their physique without first receiving ‘proper’ therapy. While we all agreed, River did not. A larger conversation ensued about the lack of mental health services in this country. But we did circle back to the story to conclude that while being transgender is not a problem, finding acceptance in the world certainly is and anyone struggling as emotionally as River displays deserves a professional ally.

I’ll paraphrase some of the other comments which generated discussion:

[loved the voice], a good representation of a young undeveloped brain and their thought pattern.

It was educational but not so enjoyable.

They tried to do too much in one book. The scope was too wide. (If they were hoping to educate.)

 It gave me more of an understanding of the mindset of people transitioning.

The author seemed to attack us dinos at one point in one of the later epilogues.

I’ll use the pronouns they request. But I want to be she/her.

It makes me want to know more.

River needed better mental health therapy. It was realistic in how resources are lacking.

One insightful dinosaur saw through the clutter that complicates queer life and simply stated:

It was a beautiful love story and I really appreciated how the author wove the ocean theme throughout.

I challenge my fellow dinosaurs, if you are in a book club, to set aside historical fiction and romance novels occasionally and invite YA into your world. To avoid extinction, we need to understand their point of view, and sharing and discussing YA literature is a great start.

Thanks to my book club friends for allowing me to paraphrase our discussion. I hope it reads true.